Apartment dweller runs dishwasher after 9 PM, downstairs neighbor leaves sticky note on door every time: 'You know what you did'

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Ally Perry • Writer and Editor
Jun 1, 2026 7:45 PM EDT

Is it fair for our neighbors to take issue with what time we do our chores?

There are a lot of things that need to be done to maintain the average home, many of which are the same whether you live in a cramped city apartment or a ranch in the middle of nowhere. The closer that you live to others, the more that you have to take into consideration how your daily behaviors may affect them—and that includes the stuff that you don't really have a choice in.

Nobody likes to be told by a neighbor that they are making too much noise, but it is particularly upsetting when they take issue with something that you can't avoid. In a case like this, both parties have to be willing to come to a reasonable compromise. Living near other people is sometimes going to be noisy, and that has to be accepted up to a point.

Still, it is not wrong to express our opinion if we are dealing with noise that bothers us. We have the right to be comfortable in our own homes, but this has to be balanced by the needs of our neighbors. 

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  • A representation of a woman bending down to take a mug out of a dishwasher
    via Getty Images (Unsplash+)

    A representation of a woman bending down to take a mug out of a dishwasher

  • In this story, somebody who lived in an apartment had a habit of running their dishwasher around 9 PM. The appliance was quiet in their home and appeared not to transmit that much noise through the floor, but all the same, their downstairs neighbors consistently began leaving passive-aggressive notes on their door whenever they used their dishwasher at this time.

    It got to a point where they were getting so frustrated with being constantly monitored by somebody they had never met, they bought their own pack of sticky notes to retaliate. They wanted to vent about the uncomfortable experience of feeling like they were being watched while doing their chores.

  • My downstairs neighbor leaves a sticky note on my door every time I run my dishwasher

    My building doesn't have quiet hours listed anywhere and my lease doesn't say anything about running appliances after a certain time. The dishwasher is also pretty quiet. I've stood in the hallway and downstairs to test it and you can hear it a little but it's not loud
    via Proud_Associate5268
  • per se. A few months ago, I got a sticky note on my door that said: please be considerate of your neighbors 2B which is fair enough. I felt bad so I started trying to run the dishwasher earlier when I could. Some nights I get home late, eat something standing over the
    via Proud_Associate5268
  • sink, spend time on my phone just to decompress, and by the time I think about the dishwasher it's already past 9. One night in February I ran it at 9:40pm and the next morning there was another note:9:40pm is late
    via Proud_Associate5628
  • Since then, it has escalated and now I get a sticky note every single time I run it after 9pm even if it's only by a few minutes. Last week's said: 9:07pm fyi we notice. Tuesday's said: 9:14pm you know what you did.
    via Proud_Associate5268
  • Yesterday morning there were two sticky notes on my door. Both were just the exact times I had turned it on just written separately like I was being audited I have never spoken to this person. I bought my own pack of sticky notes yesterday, which feels like either problem-solving or the beginning of a villain arc.
    via Proud_Associate5268
  • A representation of a woman crouching to take a bowl out of the dishwasher
    via Getty Images (Unsplash+)

    A representation of a woman crouching to take a bowl out of the dishwasher

  • MonkeyChoker80 Leave your own sticky note on the door: "I know when I run my own dishwasher. Any more of your passive-aggressive little notes, and it'll be 2am when I'm running it."
    via MonkeyChoker80
  • louisianefille You might consider looping in your landlord/property manager before they escalate to a formal complaint. Tell the landlord you feel harassed just for running your dishwasher and that you don't want any more notes on your door from them.
    via louisianefille
  • Selkior01 I'm sure everyone is aware that utility companies highly recommend running dishwashers (as well as laundry equipment) at night.
    via Selkior01
  • Maahes0 I would hang the shopping bag with the new package of sticky notes on their door
    via Maahes0
  • Shooter61 My Cove 2450 dishwasher puts out a whispering 41db. I can barely hear it run while standing next to it.
    via Shooter61
  • Is it possible that the dishwasher is vibrating the neighbor's ceiling? Could possibly be acting like an amplifier to the neighbor. Ask them to let you hear it while it's running. Maybe the LL can install a newer model with better sound
    via Shooter61
  • dampening. He can always use the old dishwasher in other lower units. Getting a grip on what's real and not could help getting the LL on board.
    via Shooter61
  • Fat-Cat-Face Just send your complaint to management. Why put yourself in turmoil with a neighbor? Have them handle it.
    via Fat-Cat-Face
  • NeverDependent Ask them politely what noise they can hear in their apartment. It might be s different and more annoying sound than what you can hear. In my building it's not allowed to use washing machine after 8 pm.
    via NeverDependent
  • islandgirljac Just run it in the morning before you leave?
    via islandgirljac
  • mercurygreen The plumbing is probably loud in his apartment - linked waste water lines.
    via mercurygreen
  • p3steelman Each time a sticky note appears, run the washer 1 hour later. I think they'll the figure it out. At this point they think they have you under control like a child.
    via p3steelman

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dishwasher neighbors bad neighbors apartment living
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